What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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