What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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