What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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