What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What do Michael Jackson and x-boxs have in common?

They're both plastic and little boys turn them on.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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