What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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