What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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